How To Choose Your People Chapter 14

Chapter 14 — Boredom (2.5)

BOREDOM (2.5)

You go to the beach for a two-week vacation. Sometimes it takes most of the journey to quit worrying about whether you turned off all the stove burners and whether the dog will feel heartbroken at the kennel. It may be another day or so before you stop waking up with the panicky feeling that you're late for work. Finally you relax and drift along with the mildly pleasant experience of no pressures or demands. You sleep late, swim, fish, loaf. When everything becomes so calm that the big event of the day is a stroll to the general store to see what's going on – you've arrived at Boredom.

It's a pleasant state where one is unconcerned about the larger issues of the world. Most of us, however, soon reach a saturation point on this level and start looking forward to getting involved again.

Not so with the chronic Boredom person. His biggest purpose in life is to kill time; he's an expert at it.

FALSE BOREDOM

About the only mistake you can make with this tone is putting people here who don't belong.

Sometimes a person gives the appearance of going up to Boredom when actually he is still in his usual tone with the volume turned down. Nothing is happening which permits him to dramatize his chronic tone.

An Apathy person may tell you almost anything was boring, because it takes such an impact to create any effect on him. Grief will complain that a funny movie was boring, simply because she found no occasion to cry. When the 1.1 is not getting enough attention to ignite his spark plugs he affects a sophisticated, hypercritical boredom: "Why are we hanging around here? Let's go where there's some action."

Such people are bored (by most definitions) because nothing is occurring that turns on the adrenaline; but they are not at 2.5 on the tone scale. The Boredom person is not complaining, not impatient. He can endure it.

Let's look in on a high school classroom. ..

"Dear Marcy, I've never been so bored. If this guy doesn't shut up pretty soon, I'm going to have a screaming fit! He's talking about grasshopper legs, for gosh sakes! Like, wouldn't you think you'd 'earn something sexy in Biology?"

Three seats behind our letter writer, a lanky six footer slumps in light slumber. Across the row, a scowling youth swings his foot impatiently.

All of them will say they are bored; but none of them are really at Boredom on the scale. The real 2.5 is sitting in the back of the room. He doodles in his notebook. He watches a fly explore the top of the desk. He wonders if the instructor is wearing a wig and decides it doesn't matter. He examines dust particles drifting through a shaft of sunlight. He thinks briefly about grasshoppers and limply resolves to read that chapter someday.

Let's turn up the volume on the true tone of the students by introducing an emergency. A huge rock smashes through the window and thuds on the teacher's desk. Papers fly. A vase of flowers crashes to the floor. The teacher jumps back. A chilling wind whips through the room. A girl screams. Another bursts into tears. Several students laugh. One of them rushes up to see if the instructor is hurt. A 1.1 affects concern while mentally planning how he'll embellish the story later. Each of them turns on strong in his chronic tone. In the back of the room, Boredom placidly watches everything. He realizes this might be serious; but he doesn't panic. Looking out the window, he wonders who threw the rock; but he decides it really doesn't matter. It's been an interesting afternoon.

WELL ADJUSTED

He's "well adjusted." The emotion is pleasurable. His attention is leisurely and slightly scattered. He wants to be entertained. He likes a certain amount of pleasant, random activity. He can occupy himself for hours, days, years with the most trivial matters. He'll wash the car, trim the shrubs, play a game of cribbage, watch the ball game on TV.

Although some large ideas may flicker through his mind from time to time, he won't be the guy who invents a new fuel to replace gasoline, and he won't join the revolution movement.

This tone is marked by a purposelessness in living.

He's careless, indifferent, mildly pleasant. You'll probably like him. He won't be attacking you, trying to undermine you, warning you, taking care of you, or sopping all over you. He won't try to draw you into his game; he's not even playing much of a game. He's just watching it.

CONVERSATION

Boredom is somewhat negligent about facts; but you'll find him comfortable and amiable. He won't pick a fight because he doesn't care whether or not you agree with him. If you introduce some static, he'll say, "Let's not argue."

He makes pointless, idle conversation. Although this easygoing guy may be able to tell you all about the neighbors, his mild gossip is never vicious. He's somewhat careless as to whether his communications are received or understood. If you try to clarify something, he'll toss it away: "Oh, it's not important."

He accepts people, not necessarily because he's interested in them, but because it would be too much trouble to do otherwise. Ask him whether he thinks you should hire Martin for the job and he'll say, "He's OK, I guess."

DEVALUATES EMERGENCIES

The 2.5 devaluates emergencies. If somebody comes along and says, "The house is burning down. Hurry! Do something!" he says, "Well, now, don't get all worked up about it."

He collects comfortable platitudes with which to dismiss all emergencies and shed all responsibilities. Tell him you're trying to find a way to make more money, and he'll shrug and discard the whole subject with: "Well, it takes money to make money."

He doesn't feel much need to do anything about anything.

Ask him what he's been doing lately; he'll probably say, "Oh, nothing much. Same old thing." He putters and loafs. He collects useless information and trivia. He may remember every baseball score since the beginning of time; but won't master a new subject that could improve his whole life.

He'll never achieve greatness unless it's thrust upon him.

SENSE OF HUMOR

There's a moth-eaten, old joke about two Britishers talking: "I was so sorry to hear that you buried your wife yesterday."

"Well, I had to, old man. She was dead, you know."

The 2.5 will laugh merrily at that one (he'll probably repeat it too). His sense of humor is so literal that he likes the groaners. His attempts at humor will include cheerful, but corny puns and platitudes – seldom original – which he will repeat predictably over and over: "Long time no see," "I should stood in bed," and "Well, shut my mouth." The witty, original puns are usually the product of a 1.1. Boredom can't be bothered thinking up anything original.

I was selecting ears of corn from a wheelbarrow in front of a farm house when the owner strolled over. "Looks like nice corn," I said.

"Yup. Fresh too. Only been picked less than an hour. I know that for a fact," he leaned forward and with a conspiratorial grin, confided: "cause I picked it myself – that's how I know."

Chuckling in appreciation of his own nimble humor, he bagged up the corn and handed me change. This agreeable exchange represents the height of original humor that will be attempted by a 2.5.

Not exactly a rapier wit, but a pleasant fellow.

THE LOVE DEPARTMENT

As a father he's OK. He has a friendly tolerance of children, although he never gets too involved in their affairs.

If you like a passionate relationship, scintillating repartee and hilarious high jinx, don't hook up with Boredom. He's far too negligent to pursue you with any burning passion. He won't even lose sleep worrying about whether or not you love him. If he wants to watch Wild Will Six-gun on television, he'll simply turn it on. He's indifferent about getting your agreement or support.

Hardly the lordly cavalier; but he'll keep the grass mowed.

IN BUSINESS

Although he doesn't look as active as many lowertone people, he'll drift along fairly well on a routine job, and he'll be much better liked by his fellow employees. He's a poor candidate for manager because he's incapable of getting others enthused and too careless of support or participation. As an idea man, don't count on him. His decision making is indifferent. Ask him, "How would you like to organize a big sales campaign?" He'll shrug and say, "I don't mind."

Not persistent, too idle, concentration poor, he's willing to do the job . Just.

SUMMARY

Boredom is a sort of high-tone Apathy. But there's flippancy in Boredom. It's much more alive, carefree and extroverted.

This is the nicest person we've met so far on our trip up the scale. If you find it hard to remember any Boredom people, it's because they so seldom say or do anything memorable.

He's a man of unused ambition, pleasant and easygoing, who won't set the world on fire – or even light a match.

He's neither contented nor discontented. He mostly wants to be entertained. He's a spectator.

Ho hum.